Don’t be deceived by apostrophes.

I have not posted on here for a long time. A conversation the other day about apostrophes get me thinking about the unnecessary confusion they cause and how their misuse raises my blood pressure. Hopefully the following will help the incidence of their misuse and keep a heat attack at bay.

Apostrophes would like you to think they are difficult and complicated things. They are not, they obey some simple rules with no exceptions, unlike tricky i’s and e’s. We were all taught in school that it is ‘i’ before ‘e’ except after ‘c’. Then we went out into the big wide world to discover that wasn’t true. I do not find that weird because schools believe that the three r’s are reading, writing and arithmetic.

Apostrophes have two main functions, to indicate omission or possession and additionally, in one situation, to avoid confusion. Apostrophes are helpful things. Bear that in mind and you will never go wrong.

Omission: for a variety of reasons letters are omitted from words, as in wasn’t in the opening paragraph. It is a contraction of was not, the apostrophe indicating the missing ‘o’. The nautical world loves apostrophes, boatswain has become bo’s’n and forecastle fo’c’s’le. I think I prefer the originals.

Possession: when an apostrophe is used to show possession, it is always associated with an ‘s’. For example, the boy’s bike. Where the word is a plural and ends in an ‘s’ the apostrophe goes after the ‘s’ as in the boys’ bike. Problems can arise with singular words that end in ‘s’, do you add ‘s to show possession? If the word ends up sounding like a hissing snake the answer is no; so, it is Charles’ bike not Charles’s bike. This is a complex area, for guidance refer to a style guide. For example, The Times style guide.

Now you might think you have spotted an exception with the possessive for it; its; however, you would be mistaken. Its belongs to a group of possessive words (his, her etc.) so does not need an apostrophe which is lucky, otherwise there would be confusion with the omission apostrophe in it’s.

Apostrophes should never be used to indicate a plural unless it can prevent confusion. When incorrectly used to indicate a plural, it is often referred to as the grocer’s apostrophe due to signs saying things like Orange’s 6 for a £1) The only place you can use an apostrophe is with single lower case letters because some plurals would be confusing. For example, plural ‘i’ could be confused with is and plural ‘a’ with as. So, mind your p’s and q’s. And whatever you do do not sell DVD’s.

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